I have nothing, yet somehow I have everything. My life is fulfilling. I wake up each day excited about the opportunity to create the life I desire. I go to sleep every night feeling fulfilled. I have so much peace. My heart is content and filled with an abundance of joy. I’m manifesting the life of my dreams. As I stated, I have nothing while still having everything. Everything I want is already mine.
A few months ago, I found myself in such a low place. I allowed others to come in and disturb my peace. It took a while for me to rise from the darkness, but here I am. Better than I was. I am in love with myself and this beautiful life. The love I have for myself is far greater than any other love I’ve ever experienced. It’s unconditional because I will love myself regardless of what happens or what I go through. Every time I make it out of a depressive episode, I’m reminded that there is always light after the darkness. Joy will always return.
While life is going well, there are a few things that could use some improvement. I genuinely believe that our words are spells, and we have the power to speak things into existence, whether good or bad. I try to be mindful of my tongue, but there are moments I catch myself engaging in negative self-talk. I’ll claim certain things about myself, such as, “I’m broke.” or “I’m hideous.” That’s a part of myself I’m working on. How can I expect to experience positivity if I’m perpetuating negativity? My therapist helped me devise a plan for improving certain aspects of my life in the coming months. I feel excited.
I also find myself trying to sabotage my happiness. Whenever I feel “too happy”, I start to wonder if it’s another manic episode or if something terrible will happen because that has been my experience in the past. I’m in a space where I’m allowing myself to experience my feelings fully without worrying about what could go wrong. Nothing is going to go wrong. I deserve to indulge in joy.
I’ve been practicing gratitude again. There are a plethora of things to be grateful for, and I’m reminded of that every day I open my eyes and climb out of bed. I’m reminded of that every time I get to do what I love (write).
I am eternally grateful for everything I have and everything on its way to me.